Life in The Red Light District

It started out bad and got worse. Then, it became a dilemma. An epic struggle between convenience and morality, if you will.

I practically live in my car--I have driven OVER 200,000 miles in the past five years. The law of averages catches up with you after a while--earlier this year, I had a bouncing piece of metal nearly kill me in a construction zone. It didn't kill me, but it did put a hole in my car and make me go "whew!". I get tons of parking tickets, which I promptly pay so I don't get hauled off to jail. But I give myself leave to shoot the finger at parking attendants (when they aren't looking) any time I feel like it--it feels therapeutic.

I guess driving alone so much makes me quirky. I naturally gravitate toward certain routes around town, and it drives Fran nuts to think that we are driving .02 miles out of our way and will perhaps arrive three seconds later to some destination. Ironically, she disagrees with my philosophy of leaving ten minutes earlier to things so we get there with plenty of time to spare, but that's another story.

The other thing that drives her completely crazy is when I let the gas level run low in the car. When you drive lots and lots of miles, you sometimes feel like your life is a big connect-the-dots between gas stations. It's not uncommon to have to fill up twice in a day. So, knowing my car, I am careful not to run out of gas but I feel pretty free to let the gauge get down in "the red", often leaving just a gallon or so in the tank--sometimes less.

About a month ago, on a Sunday afternoon, we were headed to Fran's mother's house about 45 minutes away on the highway. Even though we were in Fran's car, we were, as usual, running low on fuel, and it was getting late in the day. I passed several gas stations which would have caused us to have to loop around highway exits because I knew one station that was right on the way and would save time. The yellow low-fuel warning light came on in the car, which sends Fran into panic mode and caused her to unleash an extremely enlightening and helpful lecture on the benefits of fueling your car promptly. It made me completely change my perspective and vow to myself to do a better job in the future. Yeah, right.

Wouldn't you know it? When I pulled up to fill my car up, the attendant informed me that their credit card machine wasn't working, and that I had to use cash. I had about ten or fifteen bucks in my pocket, and for some reason it really pissed me off to have to give it to this gas station. Now all my cash was gone, just because this thing wasn't working. It was unsettling to be driving so far with no reserve, but I felt like I had no choice at this point since there wasn't a station very close and I had Frannie the Fuelminder riding along in the passenger seat, my two small children in the back, and it was about 108 degrees outside--not a good time to risk breaking down.

Back in the car, I was now on the agitated side of things and we zipped along to my mother-in-law's house, where I fixed her TV and we ate dinner. The End.

...or was it?

A week later, we received a "Courtesy Notice" in the mail with a picture of our car running a red light on this same Sunday afternoon. The notice was signed by a police officer and requested that we kindly send $75 to their office.

So, embarrassing faux pas I made here: I took the paper to Fran and demanded an explanation of why she was running red lights. She pointed out to me that it was a day that I was driving her car. Whoops #1. Sometimes it seems like I'm just asking for it, doesn't it?

Then I started looking into this situation. They actually had videotaped my car going through the intersection, and they made the videotape available online. I played through it and sheepishly admitted that it looked pretty damning. Then I played through it frame by frame, and my car clearly enters the intersection before the light turns red. The camera is at a funny angle, actually the perfect angle for photographing license plates, but a pretty bad angle for seeing the intersection and making a judgement about a car going past the line after the light turns red.

That's another misconception that I think is being preyed upon: As it has been explained to me, if your vehicle "breaks the plane" of the intersection before the light turns red, you are legally passing through the intersection. Granted, I don't believe in living life on the wild side and trying to time things out this way, but, you know, right is right and wrong is wrong. I stopped the video showing my car in the intersection with the light still yellow, and showed the frame to Fran. She was actually more outraged than I was, and said "You've got to fight that one!"

Now emboldened by communicable outrage, I Looked into the matter further, and it seems like a big scam to generate income for a backwardl, hick town.

It turns out that the City of Denton, Texas has hired a company to write a bunch of these tickets. It amounts to a citizen's arrest and not an actual traffic citation, because a traffic citation apparently can't hold up in court if it wasn't witnessed in person by a police officer. This company installs camera equipment at local red lights, records cars going through, and then sends out Courtesy Notices (calling a ticket that just makes me want to punch somebody in the teeth) that are signed by a "witnessing officer" who is stating that they looked at the videotape and that a violation has occurred. The ticket doesn't go on your traffic record if you pay it, but is a legal obligation because of the way it is filed.

By making the "fine" $75, it is just low enough that it is appealing to just pay it rather than fight it, and if you do protest it, be prepared to reserve half a day and travel to the podunk municipal courts building on the other side of the world. Oh, yeah, and if you do protest it and lose, you have to pay $100.

So, now I'm stuck. I actually protested this an set a court date. I was hoping that they were just after "low hanging fruit"--you know, the people who just pay the fine and make it go away. Logically, this is exactly what I should do. If someone asked me for advice on this, cynical Mike would tell them to do just that--I believe that this is an unwinnable case. I actually feel guilty of "cutting it too close", although technically I know that I didn't commit the offense I am being accused of. And $75 isn't going to break the bank at our house--there are lots and lots of ways I would rather spend it than give it to these tobacco-chewing bumpkins who are probably sitting around laughing at how much money they are raking in from all the sheep-like citizens of the community while clicking their tongues and shaking their heads in disgust at the video monitor and making new entries in their coffee-stained ledger. No, I'm not bitter.

I imagine that, when I show up at the courthouse, I will be opposed by an attorney representing this company. In fact, I called the company and they set up the court date at their convenience, which probably means that they have multiple cases in a row so they can just have the attorney on hand for all of them. A very wise friend of mine once told me that, if you show up for a civil case and the other side has an attorney and you are representing yourself, you lose. Period. He said to ask for a continuance and then decide if it's worth pursing. If it is, pay for an expert legal representative. I'm drawing the conclusion that me, average Joe, can't receive justice against an attorney without paying for it. It's like playing board games against someone who is hoarding the box top with the rules printed on it...

If they get the right attorney on a mission, maybe I'll find myself on trial for attempted vehicular assault and end up behind bars...

Here's the slippery slope of reasoning that wakes me up thinking about this...

1) Some dude who says he is a sworn police officer signed this form saying he witnessed an offense. That actually means something to me, and it is disturbing that it's pretty clearly a lie. I think this system is set up to take advantage of an actual problem, which is that lots of people get into accidents running red lights and such. Nobody can argue with that, and I'm not trying to defend that issue--it's just that I think this is a group who is maliciously capitalizing on this issue.

2) I think that, in a scenario where a civil ticket is given out, that there should be an overwhelming burden on the entity issuing the "fine". Otherwise, couldn't I just print out a bunch of these and send them out to the world, telling them they owe me some money and just to send it in?

3) I think that, along with this burden, is the expectation of a type II vs. a type I error. A type I error is a false positive. That's what has happened in my case--it is actually a very dangerous situation, where you say "I want to catch every single violation--therefore, we will actually accuse innocent people, too". Type II error is false negative, as in "yes, we may let some guilty people go, but we want to be sure that innocent people aren't punished."

4) It turns out that this light is right on the road which leads from the trailer park to the local Piggly Wiggly. I am sure that a lot of people are busted on this deal that can't afford the $75. Maybe if I had my say in front of this company's representative, it would make someone be more careful about their accusations. If you would like to be outraged by the following, feel free--it is a pandering, gross, exaggeration, but makes the point:

When the Nazis came for the communists,I remained silent;I was not a communist.When they locked up the social democrats,I remained silent;I was not a social democrat.When they came for the trade unionists,I did not speak out;I was not a trade unionist.When they came for me,there was no one left to speak out.

Martin Niemöller

See? I just envisioned myself as Perry Mason, using this poem stoically as my closing argument while staring off into the distance...Exhibits A and B, maps and photos, are flanking me on either side, mounted on Easels.

In other words, if I don't say anything now, maybe this will get out of hand. Like I said, it's a slippery slope.

Obviously, I have delusions of having watched too many episodes of Law and Order and fantasize about having my unhindered say in front of a thoughtful judge. Something tells me this isn't going to happen.

I think I've just spoken my mind, and I feel released from my burden. Maybe I'll just send my $75 in now...