22 January 2006

Hey There, Bubba!



Ryan has his first loose tooth.

This is making Fran and me pretty sad, realizing that his baby teeth will start to fall out. Other signs of his growing up tend to make us look at each other and make a sad face, kind of like a running joke, but more like just a running commentary of our amazement at what it's like to have a child.

Bringing me back to Ryan's loose tooth. He has some friends who lost their first tooth over a year ago, so he is anxious to join them (remember those days?) He has been claiming loose teeth for about 6 months now, but Fran just verified the first palpable wiggler just last week. I could tell it made her sad.

Could I just let nature run its course and not use it as fodder for practical jokes? Nooooooo....

We were at Party City picking up balloons for Kaitlyn's birthday party yesterday, and I spotted these "Bubba Teeth" by the cash register. I turned to Ryan and told him that we absolutely had to get them and tease Mom with them. I must have been speaking louder than I thought, because I looked up to see several people smiling broadly at the idea. Ryan saw them, too, and became very self-conscious--he's just that way, sometimes. He didn't want to have anything to do with those wax "teeth"--he thought they were gross.

----

We walked in the door, and Fran was in the kitchen. I carried in a bundle of helium balloons, and Ryan cupped his hand over his mouth. We had discussed our scripts and stage direction on the trip home.

"Hey, Fran. You remember how Ryan had that loose tooth? Well, he's got a surprise for you!"

"WHAT!!!!??? Oh, no!" I didn't anticipate how shocked she would be at the prospect of Ryan losing a tooth when the event actually "occurred".

Ryan walked around to the other side of the kitchen table, and, using his actor's instincts, held his hand over his mouth for an extra second or two. This was the time during which Fran's mind went through every possible scenario which necessitated him holding his hand over his mouth. Well...probably all but the right one.

I really wish I had one of those high-speed timelapse movies of her facial expressions as she ran through the possibilities. Among the questions she pondered were:

-I can't believe his tooth came out!
-Did someone knock it out?
-What in the world are we going to tell him about the Tooth Fairy?
-Do people still do that? How much should we leave him under the pillow?
-Did Mike do something stupid, like tie his tooth to the car and drive off?
-Is his face disfigured?
-Did he swallow it?
-I didn't think it was THAT loose!
-Is he bleeding?
-How many of them fell out?

Part of me would like to sadistically play the timelapse movie frame by frame and watch the thoughts wash over her face--that's what a practical joke is all about, right? This one lasted just a precious few seconds.

Ryan took his hand off his mouth, then: horror, confusion, relief...anger.

She shot a look at me, "Ahhhhh! You just gave me a Mini Heart Attack!" and she walked off.

It took a minute before she burst out laughing. Gee, I wonder why she has a hard time believing me...

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Priceless, Bro! Thanks for sharing...You crack me up.

-D

Miles' Mom said...

That was such a funny story. I can totally see myself reacting in similar fashion when Miles loses his first tooth.

Mike's Drumbeats said...

Thanks for commenting, MM! That "Mama Bear" (with due respects to the ursaphobic among us) instinct kicks in and makes you irrational...