What Happened to You?

I feel like I need to generate a public service announcement in the form of a personal story. It’s about a bewildering experience that I had at about the age of 29. First, I have to give a little personal history (sorry):

Despite dark childhood baggage, I feel like I’ve led a relatively charmed life. I was an Eagle Scout, near the top of my class in high school, member of the National Honor Society, and had a great work ethic from earning my own money since the age of about eight by delivering magazines and collecting aluminum cans for recycling.

I always had nicknames like “All American Boy” and “Captain America.” I really tried hard at everything I did, carefully toed the line, steered clear of drugs, drinking, etc.—in short, I was very idealistic and academic about life.

At every job I had, I rose to the top. I worked at a grocery store from the time I was 15 until I was twenty-one, meticulously learning every job in the store and being able to fill in wherever I would be most useful—I clearly remember shaking while I walked into the bosses’ office and asked for a raise—my parents told me that I had to. I had been taught how to be a cashier, but I was being paid entry-level wages, and it had gone on for about three months. The boss, a neighbor who lived a couple of streets over, was a very hard man and there was a very good possibility that I could be fired on the spot, as had happened to several of my friends who “stepped out of line” in any small way. Instead, he gave me a 40% increase, exactly what I asked for (and, the next Saturday, literally had me scrub the floor of the store with a toothbrush for seven hours in retribution).

When I was eighteen, I started working full-time in an office (yes, I kept my job at the grocery store part-time in addition to going to college full time—nobody ever believes my resume’ because my job dates don’t line up quite right). Again, I was promoted immediately, and then again to become the youngest supervisor, at age nineteen, in the history of the company.

I had a wise boss, a woman named Bobbie, who knew the ways of the working world despite having several personal problems at home and living in practically impoverished conditions. Her insight was like magic—she was always right about interpersonal decisions, staffing moves, production, everything. She had told me, “Sorry, kid, but your age is going to cut into your credibility. I’m going to give you this job, but you are going to have to act so mature for your age that nobody can guess you’re still a teenager.”

I did as she suggested, and it worked flawlessly. As fate would have it, I met my wife while working for that company (she was also working there).

To summarize those seven years as briefly as possible, I became one of the most productive supervisors and went on, when PC’s first came to the forefront, to write a customized spreadsheet program that saved the company over $250,000. This brought a lot of attention to our Dallas branch, which became the most productive in the corporation's history. Our notoriously frugal Vice President took our staff out for a steak dinner to celebrate “our” accomplishments!

Nevertheless, when it later became necessary for me to change my hours so I could finish my college degree, the company wouldn’t let me keep my job—I was demoted back to entry level, much to the delight of some. I must say that I was disappointed, actually wounded, that they wouldn’t make an exception for me despite my outstanding track record.

I held this position for three months, then I was scored as the highest-producing employee in the company’s history! I think a lot of people were surprised by this—they thought that when I was “sent down” I would get lazy or something, but I had actually gritted my teeth and was determined to overcome that unspoken negative expectation. The week after my glowing review, the Office Manager came to my desk and led me away on a special project, and I never went back to the heads-down, nose-to-the-grindstone job.

I became an in-house consultant, with the open-ended job of analyzing company performance and making improvements for maximum production and quality control. It really annoyed some of the managers that I was given my own office and whatever supplies I needed, as well as complete autonomy.

Then I graduated with a Bachelor of Science degree, and started going to graduate school with the intention of applying to medical school.

I was offered another consulting job—one that I could do from home and just turn in my hours for pay. It was for a trucking company that wanted me to analyze it’s employees’ productivity and then try to determine the profitability of different contracts and potential contracts with customers.

I felt like this was my first real opportunity to be creative in business, and I seized it and poured my heart into the project. I read books about performance and production, learned several different software programs for analysis, plugged endless numbers into equations, interviewed employees for ideas, and came up with a comprehensive business plan with absolutely no formal training. I even padded my paycheck—in reverse. I rationalized that I was doing research to catch up on my lack of knowledge, so I would subtract 5-10 hours a week when I submitted my hours for payment. I thought that if I “billed” for all my time, my job might go away due to the expense. The reverse actually happened—the owner of the company promoted me to manager, then Executive Vice President. The company went from making little to no money over it’s 17-year history to being truly profitable. And the profits increased every year I was there, and the company grew. The owner had some odd quirks of redistributing money to other corporations via accountants, so it was difficult to tell exactly how profitable things were, but billings increased five-fold and profitability increased dramatically due to the processes I put into place. I was making great money and was putting in about 70 hours per week and had 2 pagers a cell phone, and an office at my home.

Then the bottom fell out of my fantasy business world. The owner, against my wishes, hired a manager who was very politically savvy and wanted me out of the picture. I got my resume’ together and found a new job, but was unceremoniously shown the door by a gloating adversary who screwed me out of a few thousand dollars before it was all over with. The company tanked within two years.

Sorry for the autobiography, but I feel like I needed to lay it out there so I can make the following statements.

You can't let your job be your identity. I'm so glad I learned that by age 29--I've seen some people who didn't learn it until retirement. If you truly learn to believe this, it will free you from guilt and stress from work that a lot of people carry around. Your job is a means to an end--it helps you make a living while you do just that--LIVE!

No corporation will have loyalty to you, no matter what you do--and I feel completely entitled to say it, because I've been a superstar performer in both a small business and a Fortune 500 company. It's a lesson that was eye-opening to me...or was it? I don't think I spotted it the first few times I experienced it--My manager at the grocery store weighed my value as an employee vs. losing me over money, and decided it was profitable to keep me. And my office job? They hesitated all of 20 minutes before telling me that I couldn't keep my job if I went part-time in order to finish school.

The reason is that it's the path of least resistance, and the most easily justifiable decision in business--the numbers "don't lie", and loyalty to an individual does not compute (seems like a Star Trek thing: the needs of the one vs. the needs of the many...not logical). In the end, it's a form of managerial laziness.

Google refuses to divulge to me who first stated that "Capitalism without compassion is a monstrosity", but I first heard it as a teenager and filed it away as a naive, idealistic thought which came erupting back to the forefront of my mind at age 29, when my job with the trucking company was over. I got another job right away for more than double the salary, but the lesson wasn't lost on me--I was using the wrong scorecard to take stock of my life.

The irony is that, in trying to fully devote myself to the company, I hit upon some good resources that came to the surface when I hit this personal crisis.

Steven Covey's "Putting First Things First"
"The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People"
"In Search of Excellence"
"Social Style, Management Style"
Zig Ziglar
The Bible

In the absence of you establishing goals that are important to you, others will impose goals on you that are important to them, and reinforce them. They will make you think that meeting your work goals are the most important thing in life. And sometimes I still have to fight the urge to believe them.

I want to rework this thought--it should be a positive, affirming idea to free you from stress, not a downer about corporate anarchy. Love to hear what you think.