Meet the Teacher (aka Fokkers?)

Okay--just kidding a little.

For some reason, as a parent I get the feeling that teachers resent me for some reason. Like there's some kind of weird condescension when I talk to them, some subtle contentious attitude about how bad I suck as a parent...I get all defensive when I go into the school. If you don't have kids, don't pretend that you know what this is. It's a weird instinct, it reminds me of one of several people (at least one of whom is well-documented but who shall go unnamed) who used to always compare kids to her dog right up until she had the baby--then we never heard that analogy again....

Anyway, it seems like the mentality of the school is: Hey, we deal in mass quantities of these urchin youth units. Just stand back and let us do our thing and it will all be over painlessly. Which reminds me of the soldier getting strangled in The Manchurian Candidate and the brainwasher guy tells him to "please cooperate". Yes, things would be much easier if we just shuffled along sleepily without questions...

Here's an example: They want me to drop my first grader (that's a 6-year-old) off at the sidewalk each morning, drive off quickly without looking back, and trust that he probably got to class okay. I heard another parent express my thoughts, saying "Well, I would prefer to park and walk her to class, at least for now."

To which the teacher responded "This is first grade! We are stressing independence, so it would be best for you to just drop them off..."

How about this: You sign for responsibility for my child's livelihood while I follow your experimental plan. You know what, I don't care if you would do something like that--what an idiotic thing! It seems to me that a prevailing undercurrent among teachers is that parents don't care enough about their kids, or participate in their education, but then this mixed message! Seriously, I remember some of the stuff that happens at school, and I'm willing to inconvenience myself to ensure his safety for now--call me paranoid if you like, but don't we all have crazy stories?

I am a nervous wreck about my son's safety. I used to roam the streets of our neighborhood wildly when I was his age, but I feel like those days are over (they were probably over even when I was doing it...) He can't even play outside without supervision anymore. There are just too many people.

I told my wife half-jokingly that each day we take him to school, we make the decision whether or not to leave him there for the day. I know that sounds a little radical, but being a parent is just too important to not take it seriously. Ahhh, had to get that little rant off my chest.

So, we found out my son's teacher's name, and I was immediately cruel. I like to play little word games with names sometimes (which I started as a mneumonic device because I deal with so many people, but then got a little cruel with it). Well, my son's teacher's name can be morphed into the term "Dairy Cow" (don't ask). So that's what I started calling her around the house (not in front of Ryan--no, I'm not that crazy)--but it DID get inside Fran's head so she's already tripped up twice and is terrified of getting it wrong when talking to the teacher.

And what's the deal with starting school in freakin' August?!!! In Texas! Unbelievable.

So, we're being very positive to Ryan and he's stoked up and ready for summer vacation to end and get going at school again--I'm walking him in to class tomorrow...wish me luck.